This week I, Garrett Seamus O’Sullivan, continue fillin’ in fer the Grocery Outlet Wino, who apparently buggered off to explore some cold, windswept ancestral homeland in a god-forsaken corner o’ the Earth . . Meanwhile, I’ve been left here doin’ the Lord’s work drinkin’ discount wine, complainin’ about labels and tonight’s adventure was the 2023 The Forbidden Trail Cabernet Sauvignon. Right away the bottle annoyed me because the front label was covered in the sort o’ inspirational nonsense usually reserved fer the back. Somethin’ about brave souls who “seek the untouched paths.” Oh please. It’s a bottle o’ wine, not a fellowship quest through Middle Earth. Calm yerselves.
Now the first sip wasn’t bad at all… but sweet sufferin’ Saint Patrick, this was not what me tongue was expectin’ from a Cabernet Sauvignon. Very fruity, a bit sweet, barely any puckeryishness, and only the faintest whisper o’ oak. I actually stopped and checked the label again thinkin’ maybe I’d grabbed a Shiraz or one o’ those “red blend” mystery bottles where they just throw every grape into the vat like stew leftovers. Nope. Cabernet Sauvignon, plain as day.
Now don’t get me wrong—I did eventually finish the bottle, because I’m Irish, not wasteful. If ye like fruity easy-drinkin’ reds, ye could probably get along with it just fine. But when yer brain gears up fer a proper cabernet and gets ambushed by berry jam instead, it throws a man off balance. At $7.99, it’s hardly a financial tragedy. The label warned me, really. “Forbidden Trail.” Aye, next time I’ll listen to the signs and take a different trail entirely… preferably one with a bit more oak and a proper cabernet punch in the gob.
